"Suicide? I don't want to talk about that!"
Something most will say.
One in five teenagers commit suicide.
Suicide among teenagers is the #1 cause of death next to only accidental deaths.
"Life sucks!" "Why am I here?" "I wish they would just leave me the hell alone!" "I'm not important." "I don't matter." "I'm worthless." "I'm stupid." "it all just hurts too much." "I just want the pain to stop." "I just want out of here." "No one cares anyway." "I feel all alone." "What the hell's this so-called life for?" "I just don't see the point in living this life, my life's dead, I might as well be too." "I give up, I don't really care any more."
"I want to die!"
All of the above is some of what someone who is suicidal feels.
Is suicide exclusive to someone who is mentally ill?
Is suicide a coward's way out?
When someone attempts to kill them self are they crying out for help?
Is suicide preventable?
Is only someone who is depressed or suffers from a depressive mood disorder going to try and kill themselves?
Is there help for someone who is a friend and/or is family of one who is suicidal?
Why would someone want to kill their own self?
There is no clear answer to this question.
Is suicide a sin?
Will I go to Hell if I kill myself?
How can I stop someone from killing their own self?
You cannot. If someone really wants to kill their own self, then they will.
But, that being said, on the other hand, you can.
Love, emphasize, listen, be willing to be there when they want or need help.
Love covers a multitude of things.
All anyone wants is someone to care and will always be willing to listen.
WILLING, LOVING SUPPORT IS KEY TO EVERYTHING THAT I HAVE ANSWERED!!!
Depression is a serious mood disorder that quite often leads to the feelings and emotions that I started this article off with.
But that does not mean someone with a depressive disorder is always going to be suicidal.
Never make presumptions and/or assumptions.
As always, help, support and treatment are most important if one is going to reach some plane of recovery.
And remember, love is needed foremost if you are going to help or offer support.
There are other mental illnesses that could lead to suicide attempts.
Such as; personality disorders, eg. Borderline Personality Disorder.
Some of the symptoms of BPD are, self destructive behaviour. Cutting, carving, self mutilation, and so on...
Suicidal thoughts, suicidal fantasies, and suicidal tendencies.
I should add, personality disorders are serious mood disorders as well.
That's where the aforementioned behaviours manifest from.
That being serious mood swings, very dark and deep moods, and a traumatic event might lead to and/or cause the certain dark mood(s).
Bi Polar Affective Disorder and all its' wide spectrum of sub-disorders.
Bi Polar comes with manic moods, where one gets little to no sleep. Their brain is seemingly stuck in overdrive.
The individual usually thinks of themselves better than everything and everyone.
Then there's the extreme euphoria.
But all of the above can really wear on someone and quite often leads to very deep, dark anger and/or rage. Individuals have been known to be very violent.
Bi Polar also has the other side, that being a depressive state.
Where one would sleep almost all of the time.
Feelings of self-loathing, self-judgement, and so on accompany.
Feeling little to no energy at all.
So there's anger here too, one might feel anger towards them self for being this way.
All this behaviour could, might and will lead to suicidal behaviours and/or attempts.
Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder is strongly linked to Bi Polar, and can come with the suicidal behaviours. But, is somewhat rare.
Anxiety disorders have been known to lead to suicidal behaviours, as well.
Some of the anxiety disorders are alarmingly similar to BPD and BiPo.
Are there "warning signs" that someone is going to attempt to kill themselves?
Yes and no.
There are behaviours that the individual might exhibit like; going around to everyone and saying to them just how much they love them.
Seemingly always apologizing for all the bad and the wrong they did in their life.
The giving away of important possessions.
Then there's the complete separation from all family and friends.
Now, I'm not saying that if they exhibit these, some, "behaviours" that they are going to attempt suicide.
The "behaviours" are strong warning signs but could be a part of something else, like an undiagnosed mental illness, and/or an extreme depression from events that occur in their life that could be very traumatic for them. Such as constant bullying, harassment, ridicule, and harsh judgements.
If someone really wants to kill themselves, they will.
Even when there is an "intervention".
They will have a plan from the start and if need be, are willing to modify and/or have a back-up plan to use. As screwed up as that sounds.
I do not suggest a constant vigil on the individual.
That's why they withdraw.
It could also make the suicide attempt more urgent.
Suicide is very real. And deserves the utmost of respect.
If you don't, it will rear its' ugly head and will bite you in the ass, deep.
Depression, personality and/or mood disorders are, even more so, real. All the behaviours that come with most to some of mental illnesses pose a huge threat to all of us who live with mental illness(es).
As I said, do not keep constant vigil, just be willing to be there to listen and to offer a strong shoulder to cry and lean on.
I CANNOT EMPHASIZE ENOUGH, THAT YOU, AND THE FAMILY AND FRIENDS, SEEK HELP AND SUPPORT FOR YOURSELVES!!!
You need to know how to, in turn, offer support and help if asked of.
Never try to help anyone who has not asked for it!
That is presumptuous. All that will only serve to make the individual all the more angry, and maybe turn thoughts of suicide to an implantation of one's "last resort plan".
As with anything in life, love is key.
It is greatly needed if one is going to offer any kind of support.
I should add, you need to be patient, and not show any worry. Shown worry could be a stressor or a trigger to the suicidal individual.
Do not let yourself become frustrated, that is completely counterproductive.
Let the individual come to you if they want help, if you're always offering to help or to be there for them all the time is even more counterproductive. And again, could be stressors and triggers.
Just love them as any family member and/or friend would.
Now, to any suicidal individuals who feel any or all of the feelings I mentioned in the opening paragraph of this article.
Please, I repeat, PLEASE! YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!! NO!!! NOT IN ANYTHING!!!
YOU ARE LOVED!!! YOU MATTER!!! YOU ARE NEEDED HERE!!! LIFE AND THE WORLD JUST WOULDN'T BE THE SAME WITHOUT YOU!!!!
May I humbly suggest that you seek the help you sorely need.
Do not be afraid to ask for help, it does NOT show weakness, rather, it shows great strength and courage to admit to and in need of said help.
My name is Scott David Buckley, and I am a suicide survivor.
Many times over.
I live with Borderline Personality Disorder, Bi Polar Affective Disorder (BI Po II), Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, Generalized & Social Anxiety Disorder.
Which I have done so since my early to mid teenage years, and all of my adult years.
I am 45.
I know what it feels like to feel so empty, helpless and hopeless.
I do understand all the feelings and the emotions that go along with feeling that way.
In some small part I still do feel that way still.
I am not a professional in the mental health field of any kind.
I do not trust many of them.
I am just a man who has gone through a lot, saw and experienced a lot in my so-called life.
I just want to offer options to any suicidal individuals and their family and friends.
I only seek, as always, to empower and encourage the best that I know how.
AGAIN, IF YOU NEED HELP, PLEASE ASK FOR IT!!!
That goes for the loved ones of and the individual both.
SCOTT DAVID BUCKLEY
LINKS TO IMPORTANT RESOURCES: